Imaginary Mate

Posted: April 1, 2012 in Empowerment, intimacy, love, relationships
Tags: , , , , ,

My BodyTalk therapist proposed an exercise for me to do. This came about when trying to link sensuality and sexuality. She told me to write a list of attributes I am looking for. If I create my own reality, and the reality of me has changed, I want someone who compliments that change. So this is my attempt to manifest someone awesome, as opposed to a violent douchebag.

I’m also pretty sure I’ve made a list like this before, lost in a childhood diary. I like to think my tastes have evolved. Or reverted back to what I thought was ideal as a kid. Not sure which one it is. Anyways…

This is in no specific order, I’m just writing things as they come to me.

Intelligent. (This is different then educated. You can be an idiot with a degree, and not be able to talk about anything other then your area of expertise)

Passionate. (About me, about life, about his interests…)





Is capable of seeing me as both Madonna and Whore. (Obviously, I don’t mean virginal and a prostitute. I mean, as someone caring and nurturing (like a mother-type figure), as well as someone sexually confident and kinky.. In my experience, men have an incredibly hard time seeing me as an embodiment of both)

Secure in his masculinity.

Has interesting stories to tell about his life.

Knows the difference between commitment and the institution of marriage. One I want, the other I have no use for.

Tall, dark and handsome. Cliche, I know. But I think being touched by skin darker then mine is one of the most erotic things (bare in mind that people have joked about my vampiresque hue). With height, I’m short. Very short. And beauty is completely in the eye of the beholder.

Dominant but not domineering.

Voice. I’m very aural. Knows a language I don’t and is fluent in it. And says sexy things to me in that language. That I won’t understand really isn’t the point.

Gets along with my family/friends, and vise versa.

Is cool with the fact that biological children is not something I want. Edit: I’m open to it given enough of a feeling of safety and security and confidence in the other person.

Someone I am capable of being completely present with.

Loves me completely.


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