Posts Tagged ‘saying goodbye’

Sometimes, when I am feeling vulnerable, I wonder to myself why I left you.

To the uninitiated it sounds completely bizarre, I know, but I do miss you and long for you.

So I have made a list, to remind myself of why I needed to leave you, and the ones that are just like you. Because you are all essentially the same.

You brainwashed me

You set me in harms way

You warped my perceptions of what proper female/male relationships should be

You make me cry

You disrespect me

You treat me like the worst criminal

You make me doubt my own sanity

You’re treatment of me caused complex PTSD, which I still suffer from

You caused me to momentarily die

You made me believe I was worthless. You made me believe I had no one but you to rely on, and that imprisoned me. You treated me like I was nothing, and enjoyed it when I was down, as you got to pick me back up… Only to repeat the cycle over and over. You isolated me from my friends and family, to the point that it still effects my relationship with them today. I struggle to believe they are at all about me, and I struggle to fit in because I feel warped and damaged by you.

You convinced me I was crazy. You convinced me I served no purpose in life if it was not your purpose for me, and those purposes were criminal. You degraded me, you violated me, and you admittedly reveled in your misuse of me.

So. This is where I say goodbye to you.